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On being lied to..

March 28, 2013

By Elisabeth K. Corcoran
Author of He Is Just That Into You

“She told me if you’re honest with people, they trust you.” –Julie Klam
Simple, gorgeous, and so very true.
I hate being lied to. Let me rephrase…I hate finding out that I’ve been lied to. 
Just think about the expense of energy when you’re in conversation with someone. The person tells you something. You are present. You react, you respond. You internalize what this person has said.  You move on with it as if it’s truth.
Think about the interactions between the lie and finding out about the lie.  Think about how you moved deeper into relationship with this person as if this person were a truth-teller and not actually a liar.  Think how you invested, and gave more of yourself, and shared your heart, all under the false assumption that intimacy and authenticity were your shared reality.
I’ve learned a lot the past several years.  But maybe the best lesson is I’ve learned who I do not want to be, and who I do not want to be anymore.
Who I do not want to be is this: I do not want to be a liar.  I want people to trust me.
Who I do not want to be anymore: I do not want to blindly accept lies as truth.  I want to be discerning.
I want to become how I want to be treated.

What is one character trait that you’ve been hurt with that you can turn around and making living amends for by enfolding it into your life?

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