The REAL You Questionnare!

Submitted by: Gienie Assink

I recently received one of those forwarded e-mail things I usually delete without opening, because whenever I let myself get sucked in, I am informed in the last sentence that if I don’t send it on to 12 other people, I will have bad luck for the rest of my life for breaking the chain.

I don’t like being threatened, and those things put me in a mood for the rest of the day. (Do not send me any more of them — and you know who you are — or I will construct one of those voodoo dolls with your name on it and use it as a pin cushion.)

This particular email, however, was a “Getting to Know You/Me” questionnaire, the answers to which maybe even your closest friends and family members might not know about you. Answers that reminded me of who I am, because it’s been years since I’ve thought about some of this stuff.

I went for it and answered everything. Like that my favorite flowers are white daisy’s because they are so friendly… and they grew right outside my window when I was a kid.  I really should get some and put them in our yard this year.

Or questions like… what happened on the night of your 16thbirthday? Well… I’ll tell you, on the night of my 16th birthday I stuffed pillows under the covers to approximate a sleeping me and climbed out the window and through the Daisy plants and met Adran Nakagawa and some other school friends. We went to the local school field and smoked some cigars I’d swiped from my father.

That part was fun. Unfortunately, Adran’s mother called my house because she discovered he wasn’t in his room, and my mother tried to wake me up to see if I knew where he was.

When I snuck back into the house at about 2 a.m., my father was sitting in his favorite chair, slapping his favorite leather belt across his knees.

I never snuck out again.

Other questions included: “What scares you the most?” (ending up a bag lady, wheeling my worldly goods around in a shopping cart and calling a refrigerator box home, while parading around 18 mangy cats…ewww) and, “When was the last time you cried?” (HeLLOOOO  Jane Austen fan here people… I cry every time I watch one of her masterpieces).

I hadn’t really thought much about such things, but there you have it. Possibly, I will start hoarding money, now that I’m aware and have to come up with a new fear.

“Diamonds or pearls?” was another question, and pearls was my answer. How whacked am I??  I just didn’t realize how much I really liked them.

Who says no to diamonds? I should seek help.

“How do you vent anger?” was probably the most interesting question, even if I didn’t much like my own answer, which is to cuss like a longshoreman, then laugh at myself for being so rude.

And… if you’ve not found a way of your own to vent, I suggest you give it a try. Well. In the privacy of your own home, certainly, and not in front of the kids or animals.

“What color socks are you wearing?”

I am not a big fan of socks and only have about 3 pairs which are striped, polka-dotted, and/or decorated with stars.

That could make me seem like a no-sock kind of human, which would totally be off base, but this was supposed to be about the truth.

I wish now I’d lied.

“Have you ever colored your hair?” the question demanded.

Certainly not! I have naturally pink hair and dark roots.  =)

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