Building Character with Goals and 3 Simple Questions
by Jean Tracy MSS
A great way to build character in kids is through goal setting. But how? Bob Proctor, the great author and motivational speaker, offers 3 essential questions. Before learning about the questions let’s find out the importance of positive goals.
Why Parents Need to Teach Positive Goal Setting
Children must see goals clearly because, like all of us, they move toward their pictures. If their pictures portray failure, they will fail. This is where you come in. Teach them to form positive pictures with clear goals.
How Moving Toward a Negative Picture Causes Failure
Let’s pretend your son is picturing failing a math test. He decides not to study because he’s telling himself, “Why try? I’ll never get it.” The result will be failure because he turned his self-talk into a negative picture.
What Can You Do to Promote Clear Goals with Positive Pictures?
Ask your son to clearly picture receiving a good grade. Give him all the time he needs. Ask him if he likes the feeling that goes with getting a good grade. Chances are he’ll say, ‘Yes.’
Next ask him to picture himself studying for the test and answering all the questions correctly. Does he like the feeling of success? If so, he’s ready for Bob Proctor’s first question.
1. Can you do this?
In other words, can you study for the test to pass it? If your son’s answer is, ‘Yes,’ ask him the second question.
2. Are you willing to do it?
Meaning, are you willing to study for the test to pass it. If he’s willing to do it, then ask the third question.
3. How can you make it happen?
Get him to brainstorm solutions.
His Possible Solutions:
1. Study the examples in the book.
2. Take time to think through each problem.
3. Ask the teacher, you, or a classmate for help.
Your Action Step:
Talk to your child about how our thoughts are the pictures we make come true. Ask your child to start by sharing a small goal with you. Ask the 3 questions. If the answer to the first two is “Yes,” then ask your child, “How can you make it happen?”